Having been in the enlisted ranks for some time, I found myself very accustomed to being referred to by my rank and last name and/or last name only. Once I became an Officer, the custom of addressing peers by first name took a little getting used to. With names such as Richard, William, Robert being customarily shortened to Dick, Bill, or Bob, it is always interesting when we assume the former and find out some time later that the individual actually preferred to be called Rich, Will, or Rob.
Given the impact of personal branding and making that initial impression, does it make a difference whether one uses the formal name or the preferred nickname when submitting resumes and letters? ...what about during the first in-person meeting?
Answers
You can never go wrong by "starting at the top and working your way down" when it comes to addressing people you don't know well in a professional or academic environment. But, you it's harder to "work your way up."
My suggestion is that you always refer to people as "Mr." or "Miss" or "Doctor" or whatever the first time you meet them, and continue to do so until: 1) they say "please, just call me [fill in how they way to be addressed]." Or, 2) you can do what Gov. Sarah Palin famously did right before her 1998 debate with her opponent , then-Senator Joe Biden. She just came out and said "Is it ok if I call you Joe?"
When you feel comfortable with asking, you can inquire "may I call you Mary?" or "now that we're going to be working together, I wish we could be a little less formal. Please call me Bill." Most times the other person will then reply in kind by saying "Hi Bill, just call me Mergatroid" or however they like to be called.
While Governor Palin's action may seemed a bit odd at the time, it was a shrewd move on her part. If she had ASSUMED to address him as "Joe" during the debate it would have looked a bit familiar and disrespectful of her to use his first name rather then properly refer to him as "Senator Biden." On the other hand, if he had replied, "no, you can call me Senator Biden, Governor," then HE would have looked a bit pompous and self-entitled, and would have been counter to the "I am a man of the people" image he tried to project.
It is very rare, except in the medical or academic realms, for civilians to address each other by their title. You probably wont find anyone saying, "Accountant Jones, please bring me the checks to sign," or "Systems Analyst Smith, where are the updates to the inventory program," for example.
A university professor is likely to be addressed as "Doctor Jones" or "Professor Jones," even if they are an "officer of administration," such as a Dean or Department Chair or Provost. Hospitals and other health care delivery sites tend to be more formal, especially in a clinical setting where it's obviously very important that people with different roles (i.e., physican, nurse, technician) be assigned tasks consistent with their title/role/licensure. Non-academic university officers (e.g, Dean of Students or Dean of Advising) are often addressed as "Dean" even if they don't have Ph.D or Ed.D degree.
Some former elected officials are entitled to use their formal title after they leave office. These include former state/territorial governors and former members of the US Senate. It is also common for someone who has served as an Ambassador to retain use of that title after their appointment ends. Retired Admirals and Generals also use their title/last rank after retirement, and I've met a few navy Captains and army/air force/marine Colonels who also like to be addressed by their "rank" after they retire.
On the other hand, if you ASSUME to address someone by their first name at the start, or by some nickname/contraction, it is possible you will offend them and start off on the wrong foot. For example, some years ago I met, briefly, retired General Alexander Haig, who had also served as Secretary of State. I was unsure whether to address him as "Mr. Secretary" or "General," so I opted for "General," which turned out to be correct. But, I would not have assumed to address him as "Al" unless he said it was ok for me to do so, which I doubt he would have done.
Hope this helps
Andrew Karp
Sierra Data Science
http://www.SierraDataScience.com
Sonoma, CA
William,
All good advice above, but I would like to add a bit about personal branding. I am an entrepreneur and small business advisor and owner. One of my clients, years ago, nicknamed me "The Bulldog" because of my tenacity in getting to the root cause of a problem. When I started my own business, I built on that and named my company "The COO's Bulldog" because I frequently worked with Chief Operating Officers. I write a Blog called the same name. I have found that people that I meet don't usually look me up online by my name, but by my brand.
When I teach a class on "elevator speeches" I counsel people to find a way to create an image in the other person's mind that will not be forgotten. One time, a woman who had been an adminstrator for over 20 years was fearful about ever finding another job was in my class. After going through our exercises, she came up with a phrase as follows: "My name is Jane Doe, I analyze and I organize." Another person, who happened to have the same name as an American historical figure came up with this opening to talk about her marketing skills, "My name is Anne Oakley. I don't have a gun but I am always on target!"
If you can come up with a way of describing yourself that creates a lasting image in the other person's mind, you will be ahead of the game.
If you should ever want to talk about this directly, you can contact me via my Blog, The COO's Bulldog.
Best regards,
Kevin Callahan
All:
Understood; and thank you for the speedy responses.
Regards,
William (often called Will, Bill, Billy, and my *sarcastically* favorite...Will-I-Am)
Resumes and written notes, go formal. I agree with the comment about starting at top and going down. However, when meeting in person, just ask the simple question " what do you prefer to be called". This is not insulting to anybody and they will let you know. Do not assume other people using a name are correct. I know a person whom everybody calls Dave. Yet, if you ask that person what they preferred to be called, they say David. Do not suggest what they want to be called, just ask them. Good luck
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